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Are You Feeling A Little Insecure And Lost Around Here? Here’s 10 Ways To Start Taking Control

Actually this is true for me round about now with the new LinkedIn Makeover. I don’t know about you guys but it’s taking me a while to get use to it. Not because of the functionality I got that straight away, but it was more about the wired and unspoken feelings it’s making me feel.

The new layout and updates is making me feel somewhat closed out from my connections on LinkedIn and a little lost and overwhelmed. Who know like that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach just before you go on stage to speak thinking,

“Is anyone actually going to listen to what I have to say?”

I actually took two week break from LinkedIn to access what was really happening to me and why I was feeling this way.

Why Was I using LinkedIn? I asked myself

  1. To rub my ego?
  2. To help others like me by sharing my years of expertise?
  3. To connect with like minded individuals?
  4. To learn new industry information, tips and advice?

Those kind of questions I’ve spent the couple of weeks thinking about. And I came to the conclusion that I was having a small case of social media withdraw symptoms.

There has been some interesting articles out there surfacing on how social media is effecting our youth self-esteem, but I bet it’s more than the younger generation it’s effecting.

I had this same conversation with my sixteen year old daughter. She mentioned that how it so much difficult to date a guy these days with the involvement of social media like Facebook, everyone and the auntie seems to know more about the going on’s in your relationship more than you do.

After allowing myself some time and space away from social media. I decided as I do to take to writing about it as I’m sure there are some out there who are feeling somewhat lost and lonely just as I am if we are honest about.

So here’s 10 Ways To Start Taking Control Of Your Life A Little More

Practising positive thinking allows us to focus on our strengths and accomplishments, which increases our states of happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time making progress, and less time feeling down and stuck. The following tips I provide below are practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift yourself and your state into a more positive thinking, habit and patterns.

1. Take Good Care of Yourself

It’s much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest.

2. Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For

Stresses and challenges don’t seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are right in life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference.

3. Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions

A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member’s bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don’t waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless you have proof that there is something to worry about.

4. Refrain from Using Absolutes

Have you ever told a partner “You’re ALWAYS late!” or complained to a friend “You NEVER call me!”? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like ‘always’ and ‘never’ makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that certain people are incapable of delivering.

5. Detach From Negative Thoughts

Your thoughts can’t hold any power over you if you don’t judge them. If you notice yourself having a negative thought, detach from it, witness it, and don’t follow it.

6. Squash the “ANTs”

In his book “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life,” Dr. Daniel Amen talks about “ANTs” – Automatic Negative Thoughts. These are the bad thoughts that are usually reactionary, like “Those people are laughing, they must be talking about me,” or “The boss wants to see me? It must be bad!” When you notice these thoughts, realise that they are nothing more than ANTs and squash them!

7. Practice Lovin’, Touchin’ & Squeezin’ (Your Friends and Family)

You don’t have to be an expert to know the benefits of a good hug. Positive physical contact with friends, loved ones, and even pets, is an instant pick-me-up. One research study on this subject had a waitress touch some of her customers on the arm as she handed them their checks. She received higher tips from these customers than from the ones she didn’t touch!

8. Increase Your Social Activity

By increasing social activity, (outside of the internet) you decrease loneliness. Surround yourself with healthy, happy people, and their positive energy will affect you in a positive way!

9. Volunteer for an Organisation, or Help another Person

Everyone feels good after helping. You can volunteer your time, your money, or your resources. The more positive energy you put out into the world, the more you will receive in return.

10. Use Pattern Interrupts to Combat Rumination

If you find yourself ruminating, a great way to stop it is to interrupt the pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. Rumination is like hyper-focus on something negative. It’s never productive, because it’s not rational or solution-oriented, it’s just excessive worry. Try changing your physical environment – go for a walk or sit outside. You could also call a friend, pick up a book, or turn on some music.

When it comes to the corporate world, protocol is pretty much the religion. To know the things needed to do are the basics of productivity, but interaction and having a steady mind makes up the entire thing to true productivity. There are those who seem to work well even under pressure, but they’re uncommon ones and we are human and imperfect. To get these little things like stress under our skins won’t solve our problems.

Sometimes it takes a bit of courage to admit that we’re turning to be workaholics than tell ourselves that we’re not doing our best.

Take the time today to listen to your heart and don’t let the facades of life rub you from truly living your life.

Thank you for taking out the time to stop and read my last article. Your more than welcome to continue the conversation over at Rachael Academy.

Much Love



Rachael Aprill Philips is the CEO and Founder of Rachael Academy the online platform for entrepreneurs to help them launch, run and grow highly successful businesses. Helping entrepreneurs and small business owners build 7 FIGURE Brands. Named Top Global Marketing Expert by Hffingtom post.

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